|
|
Effects of Premature Ejaculation On The WomanPerhaps unsurprisingly, female partners of men with premature ejaculation (PE) report significantly reduced satisfaction with sex, greater interpersonal difficulty with their partners, and significantly higher numbers of sexual problems than women whose men do not come so quickly. Other aspects of sexual arousal and pleasure, including such things as lubrication and ability to orgasm, are also a lot worse in the partners of men with premature ejaculation than they are amongst the rest of the population. Initially one might think that this is because the men who come quickly are less competent in sexual techniques, less able to pleasure their partners, and more anxious about sexual interaction with women than other men. And indeed, it turns out that just over 50% of women who are partners of men classed as premature ejaculators say they have problems reaching orgasm: by contrast, in the general population, only a quarter of women report this difficulty. Video: Lucy Allen singing about premature ejaculation.
Because there's a link between how easily women reach orgasm and the duration of foreplay, one might think that rapid ejaculation was an irrelevance when considering how satisfied women are sexually. In other words, there is no reason why any man, regardless of how quickly he comes, could not give a woman an orgasm before intercourse starts. Intuitively, this is perhaps what one would expect, but the difference in sexual satisfaction among women strongly implies that men with PE are much less competent sexually in both their ability to sustain vaginal intercourse and in non-penetrative sexual techniques. This suggests that they may simply lack sexual confidence, or find sex threatening in some way. No Delay - No Way!But for a woman, the major concern for women who are partnered with men who experience rapid ejaculation on a regular basis is the abrupt and sudden break in intimacy or sexual pleasure which results from the man ejaculating too soon. As sex therapists have often reported, the reaction of a woman to her partner's early orgasm changes over time. To start with, women often avoid raising the subject lest they hurt their partner's feelings or increase his feeling of inadequacy. This collusion of silence may mean there is poor communication within the relationship in general, where neither partner is willing to discuss this or other problems. But, perhaps inevitably, at some point the woman will raise the issue, only to find that her partner denies there is a problem or that he is still reluctant to discuss the subject. At this point a woman may begin to experience feelings of frustration or anger, and possibly even contempt, towards her partner. These feelings, if left untreated, can naturally develop into irritability, interpersonal difficulties, and the fracturing of the relationship. You can see that the natural course of the female partner's emotional response to the man's PE is comprised of a number of stages. Initially she experience the lack of orgasm due to the man's not knowing how to delay ejaculation, and feels the abrupt end of intimacy as a lack of sexual pleasure caused by the man's behavior. However, as time goes by, she may gradually lose her sexual desire, find that she is not aroused by her man's touch to her genitals, begin to experience vaginal dryness, and eventually, she may become anorgasmic. Needless to say these difficulties will inevitably produce great emotional and physical dissatisfaction and stress for both the woman and her partner. Another fascinating finding is that women who are partnered with men who have symptoms of erectile dysfunction tend to blame themselves for his problem, while partners of men with PE tend to blame the man. Very often, it is the partner's anger and frustration that the man has refused to do anything to deal with his premature ejaculation that provides the impetus for the man, or the couple, to seek professional help. You can read more about the impact of premature ejaculation on men and women here.
|
